last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
