He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
