I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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