I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
