at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
