And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
