You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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