Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Randomize
