Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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