Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize