she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
