Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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