About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
