we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
