so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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