But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
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