I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
