But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
