things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
