it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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