Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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