she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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