if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
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