why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
