i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
