Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
