sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
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