did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
You're a disaster
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