Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
