You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
