Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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