Swine flu. Run for my life!
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
