I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
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