we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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