Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
