Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
