Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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