If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
