Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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