I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
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