we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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