I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
