awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
