did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
