but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Randomize
