She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize
