What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
