I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
