Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
