He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize